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Saturday, June 2, 2012

A Married Woman : Manju Kapur


After her debut novel, Difficult  Daughters, Manju Kapur has followed it up with ' A married woman', another story highlighting the struggle within a seemingly conventional woman to find her identity in the family and the society. 'A married woman ' starts in the period 70s and 80s, the period, when the 'difficult daughter'   signed off.

If the first novel was about education vs marriage, the second is about a woman's right to own property, manage finances, develop her talents, explore her passions, thrive for self actualization and all this from within the safety and security of a rock solid marriage.

The story starts with, Astha, a middle class college student,  running away from 'girl seeing ceremonies' and the constant talk of her marriage at home. She has a couple of teenage flings before finally getting married to a 'good boy' as arranged by the parents.

While the husband has relatively liberal views on women, he continues to take his role as the 'sole provider' too seriously. I suppose, this is one role men have to go easy on and women have to be a little more serious about to bring about harmony at home.

As the story unfolds, there is a nice description of the fears and aspirations of a middle class family , in the 80s. Astha's parents, pay the price for not preparing well for the retirement, while Hemant's parents ride the boom in demand for property.  

After a few months of married life, 'dullness' sets in. With, undemanding in-laws and  ample support from domestic help, she has enough free time to be restless. She has to take up a job. It had to be a teaching job, which she dreaded.

In-laws approved " It is a good time-pass"
Mother: " As a teacher you will earn some money, you will be out only half a day, so the house will not suffer"

father: "It will do until you decide to develop yourself in other ways"
Husband :- With a job you won't get fidgety if I am a minute late"

So, a career is made, for all these reasons, while Hemant's business picks up well to provide for the family.  Kids come, grow old enough to go to school, depending less and less on their mother. Obviously it is not a life fulfilling enough for Astha.

Astha's latent talents surface, encouraged by the attractive Street Play director , Aijaj. She starts painting. Babri masjid issue comes up , conveniently enough, so that Astha can express her social awareness and responsibilities with her painting talents.

Enters Pipleeka  Khan, to arouse in her a kind of sensuality, which she did not know that it existed.

Now you have a married woman donning many hats and switching deftly among the many roles that she plays; as wife , daughter in law, mother, an artist  a social activist and  a passionate lover to her lesbian partner. So much for self-actualization.

Naturally, it is not easy to play so many conflicting roles. She resorts to lies and deceit which is sort of justified , for whatever reason.

"She began to lie at home about where she was going and what she was doing. Most of the girls she knew who were seeing boys lied. It was routine self protective thing . And how necessary, Astha had seen."

"Her lies grew skillful. Her desperation and her need had ensured that they tripped off her tongue, as though she had rehearsed them for hours."

Much has been said about the rendition of a lesbian relationship. Frankly it is not easy to understand.   

".......Afterwards, Astha felt strange, making love to a woman took getting used to. And it felt strange, making love to a friend, instead of an adversary."


Strange it is ! to call men as adversaries, and if so, it is stranger to call 'having sex' as 'making love'.

A good read, if only to learn or understand  a little more about the women in your lives.
































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